When we're stressed, the mind wants to go a mile a minute. It can feel like oh my God, like I need to do this, and I wish I could do this. It's just idea, idea, idea.
Your mind just wants you out of your stressful moment. And, that's awesome. It's helping you out. It's actually saying: this sucks, you know you don't want to be here. So I'm gonna to give you ideas of things you used to do in the past because you need to feel relaxed.
It's like this big neon sign. Relax!...
What happens for you when you feel disappointed and wish you a task a little bit better, you did something or said something, or wish you didn't?!
Many times we jump straight into another action. We don't give ourselves permission to just be disappointed. Instead, try to feel what it feels like in your body. Sit there with those body sensations, not the thoughts, not the stories.
If thoughts and stories do appear, allow them to be. But don't really give them a lot of your...
Let's just get right down to it, it all depends.
Sometimes we need those little moments where we say okay, let's just do this, let's just get over the fear and just bam, do it.
But then sometimes when you're finished, you think, okay, I did it. Yet, there's this part of you that doesn't feel right with the results. You wished you would have taken a little more time. And I think the reason why that happens is because you weren't really connected to what you actually...
Sometimes people don't want to listen to our advice.
They want to just keep on making the same mistakes, even when we are a person that knows better, that's been there, done that. We know exactly what they need. We tell them what they need, but they still won't listen.
That can be frustrating.
So what are some things you can do?
Well first off you can honor them. You can use this method that actually I learned from Susan Stiffelman, a family and marriage therapist. She...
Have you dealt with someone who thinks that they're never wrong and they usually don't apologize for anything?
This can be so frustrating!
But you know what?
It's okay. Give yourself permission to be frustrated. Allow those emotions. But don't throw those emotions on top of the situation.
So what do I mean by that?
Feel them in your body, but take a moment to not say something to this person.
Take a step back. Communicate to them that, "You know what? I need a moment to myself....
Right now you may feel bogged down and overwhelmed because nobody is listening to you. It's frustrating. It can make you scream at the top of your lungs: why is nobody listening to me?
So, here's a crazy thought.
Maybe you're talking to the wrong person.
And what do I mean by that?
Sometimes our needs, our desires, our wants, our frustrations are actually a part of us saying: hey you know what? I don't like the way things are going.
When we feel that signal, we want to put it...
We can get bogged down with this feeling of you know what, if I'm not ranting and raving and I am on this defensive mode to just get my point across, nobody's gonna listen to me. Nobody's gonna take me seriously unless I am loud and forceful.
And then I realize that nobody is even listening to me when I am forceful. They're just ignoring me.
But you have this point you want to make. You have this big something that you want to share with the world, or with your kids, or with...
You may have a challenge going in your life, and you have no clue how to solve it. It can seem like there's no way that things are ever gonna change.
What if it was OK to allow things to have a bit of space to unfold?
That can feel ridiculous, right? You may be thinking: Seriously? You're telling me to slow down. Just let things unfold. It'll all fall into place.
Yet, have your tried it?
You can start out simple with this technique. Just listen to your frustrations....
Sometimes things don't feel like they're going right, like nothing is going right, and you want control.
You want to regain a sense of control because you feel like nothing's going right, nothing's going your way. If only this, if only that, I could just feel like things were working out for me.
Well, here's a bit of little tough love. Why can't you let things just be as they are? What if you let go of that sense of control, you can actually see what's going right in your life.
The feeling of emptiness, feeling unfulfilled at work can really bring us down, especially when you're in a position that you just can't quit your job.
What do people say to us?
Well, look on the bright side, at least you have a job. At least you have money coming in. Some people don't even have that opportunity.
Sometimes that may help to snap you out of that funk that you're in. Sometimes you're just unhappy and nothing seems like it would help...